The Four Stages of Learning: Applied to Dating

Getting good with women is a process that you can follow, no matter where you're starting.

Let's look at The Four Stages of Learning to understand how. I didn't invent this learning model, but it is often used to describe the stages we go through as we learn a new skill; working our way from complete ignorance to instinctive ability.

The Four Stages of Learning will help you realize and believe that you can become more successful with women and dating if you just stick at it and practice. We'll use 'getting a woman's phone number' as an example of how things can eventually become natural for you.

Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence.

This is where any learner starts. He is not aware that it is possible to obtain a woman's phone number. Further, he is not even aware of his ignorance to it. To get to the next stage, he will need to become aware that men get phone numbers of women all the time, and that he is completely ignorant to how it is done.

Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence

The learner has become aware that certain behaviors and skills are required. He becomes aware that it is normal to get a woman's phone number, but is unsure of how to go about it. He realizes that although other people know how to do it, he does not.

He wonders how others do it. He becomes determined to learn, but as yet has no knowledge and is unable to obtain a woman's phone number. He becomes aware of his ignorance.

Stage 3: Conscious Competence

The learner is able to execute the moves with conscious effort. He has learned the processes required to get a woman's phone number, but they have not yet become automated. He has to think through each stage carefully In order to do it successfully.

People often think the learning process is over at this stage, but it isn't. You may be able make it appear natural, but you will have to consciously think through the process while doing it. You also might buckle under pressure if you are challenged or if unexpected factors arise in the form of protests or refusal.

Not discouraged, you will push on knowing that it will eventually become natural for you to get a woman's phone number.

Stage 4: Unconscious Competence

The learner is able to execute the moves without having to consciously think about it. He no longer has to consciously strategize to get a woman's phone number.

It has become as natural as walking or talking. This is the last and ultimate Stage of Learning and it is what you should aim for in all areas. With practice and persistence, every single guy is capable of internalizing and automating his ability to naturally attract women.

Understanding vs. Understanding + Being Able to do: Anyone can say, "Yeah, I understand that...it makes sense."

But can those same people do it? Think about it. Most guys can understand that they need to be confident and not worry about being rejected when approaching a woman to start an interaction. But, when it 'comes to the crunch' they just can't do it.

Suddenly, they become paralyzed by a fear of rejection. The confidence they spoke about is nowhere to be seen. It is one thing to understand something and another to be able to do it.

It's Like Learning to Play a Musical Instrument: If you want this area of your life to become natural and easy, then you will need to practice.

Let's imagine that you're learning to play a guitar. In the beginning you struggle to play a few notes. Then, with a bit of practice you're able to play short pieces.

A smile creases your face. "Wow, I did it!" You keep practicing. A month later you can play a full song. Three months later you can play an elaborate instrumental for your friends or family.

You feel comfortable with a guitar in your hands. Something that was once an awkward challenge is now becoming fun. One day, you reach a point of being able to pick up a guitar and launch right into playing something beautiful without having to think about it.

It has become natural. Your experiences on your journey to success with women will closely mirror this. At first a lot of what you try may seem awkward or difficult. Some of it may even feel unnatural when you try it.

Eventually however, you will feel comfortable interacting with women in the manner suggested. You will not only understand how to be successful with women, but you will be doing it with the ease of a natural.

Your Past With Women, Does Not Equal Your Future With Women: If there are negatives in your past with women, please forget it and decide to let go of any bad feelings you have.

This is a new beginning. Forget what you've been told about women and dating from friends, family and TV. Why?

Most people are not speaking from personal experience, and have simply lifted their 'knowledge' from convenient media sources such as magazines and television. You are now taking charge of your life and can access the correct information from all over the internet, in order to succeed.

If you can make a real commitment to yourself to get this area of your life handled by using The Four Stages of Learning, then you have a lot of fun times to look forward to with women.

About The Author-- Dan Bacon is the CEO of TheModernMan.com who provide dating advice for men. Pick up artist, Nice guys, Seduce women, approach women, pick up women Good pickup line, pickup line The Game Neil Strauss How to pick up a woman

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