What to Say When You Don't Know What to Say!

There are times in every relationship when for some reason or another you find that you're not too sure about what you're supposed to say. There are many reasons for this, and most of them are because you don't want to hurt your partner's feelings by saying the wrong thing! Occasionally, it could be because you're so overwhelmed with happiness, but this is far less likely to be the case as happiness on that scale doesn't always need words to convey what you are trying to say.

Suppose you're at a stage in your relationship where you are wondering whether or not you should stay in it, or whether it's time to call it a day - and suddenly, from out of nowhere, your partner proposes to you! You are obviously not having the same experience in the relationship that your partner is having, but what do you say when he's on one knee offering you an engagement ring?

What do you say when you find out that your partner isn't telling you the truth, and the only reason you know that is that you found something in his pocket that shouldn't have been there. You don't want them to think that you've been checking up on them, but at the same time, you can't let the situation rest without finding out why your partner has been less than honest with you.

The thing with these kinds of situations isn't that you shouldn't say anything, or even what you say, but rather that you get the moment right before you say anything. It could be that at the time the situation arises, the best thing is to say nothing, or to stall for time by either asking for time to think, depending on the circumstances - and then think carefully about what it is you want to say, before choosing the right moment to bring the subject up again.

If you don't feel as if you can discuss the situation without having your partner trying to change your mind, or without getting angry, you may want to consider writing down what you have to say. Remember that a letter is just written words, and it may sound a lot harsher than if you were saying the words that your partner won't want to hear in a more gentle tone - so read the letter without the emotion that you know is there to get an idea of how someone else would read it. If it's important enough for you to have to write down your thoughts, you may want to have someone you trust read it through before you give it to your partner so they can tell you how it comes across to them.

Sometimes not knowing what to say is your instinct's way of telling you that this isn't the time to say anything at all. Listen to your instincts - you could make a bad situation far worse by getting into a conversation that you're not comfortable with and at a time when you aren't prepared to deal with having it.

About The Author-- Jane Saeman runs a site called along with info on dating and relationship on her blog at at http://www.Hot-Firefighters.com/blog2

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